Summer is the easiest time of year to feast. The humans wear shorts and skirts. Exposed ankles. Even a pair of capri pants is suitable.

Winter is treacherous. In the cold months, the humans cover up in long pants and high boots, making it impossible to penetrate. You must find a church or office building where the women are societally encouraged to wear skirts in winter no matter the temperature. It’s best to consider migration.

Now, having established the best time of year, the next note is location. Choose a spot the human will be distracted in a crowd. A busy coffee shop, or a loud concert. Try to avoid the line at the grocery store. An irritated human is more likely to notice you. 

You may try to get both human legs consecutively, but it is best to take one meal and flee the scene. In this case, switch between which foot you use for feedings, or you’re liable to end up with ingrown toenails from built up pressure. 

Flip flops are the easiest form of footwear, that should be obvious. Lifting the foot to hover an inch from the back of their leg is close enough. Practice in balance is necessary. Yoga and martial arts classes will help improve your ability to hover one foot off the ground without the human noticing. 

And lastly, don’t worry too much. The humans believe vampires either don’t exist or have fangs in their mouth for biting necks. Their folklore has never guessed we suck blood from the back of their legs with an extending pinky toenail. 

Happy feeding.